“I am taking a gap year.” I announced it at the dinner table last year (final year of IB). Silence met my statement. And then one word “Why?”

It’s been a year. I still don’t know why. Even though every time my granny, dad, sister, aunt, cousin, grandfather, teacher, best friend, godmother, neighbour, classmate, doctor, employer, colleague, coach, hairstylist, mailman, shopkeeper, or a simple stranger ask if it was worth it, I say that it was the best decision of my life. What surprises me the most is how many people care about my decision – or maybe it’s not they who care but me who cares about their opinion.

And maybe it was. Maybe it was the best decision I could have ever made in my short life. I just didn’t know it yet. And here is that monster I’ve been scared my whole life. The one lurking underneath my bed and stealing all my toys. It’s called The unknown.

Disclaimer alert: there are no instructions on how to fight such monsters. The only thing I could find on Google was to “Fight the monsters with foam swords.” Well, isn’t this useful. Me a nineteen year old adult who can legally vote, drive and get married fighting monster with imaginary swords. I already see myself standing in my yard doing just that. What will the neighbours say?

Yet, now as the first half of my gap year approaches its end I can say this. Gap year is an emotional rollercoaster. You have to be disciplined to wake up responsibly and not at 1PM. You have to find passions you want to pursue (even perfecting the recipe of chocolate cookies is better than nothing). You have to be okay with being with yourself and your thoughts (and let’s be honest it’s not everybody’s cup of tea).

But a gap year is worth it. If you at least do one thing worthy.

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